Trees on the Beach, a Blog

So I am watching some TV trash that I enjoy, Van Helsing .  The season 3, episode 5, where some of the survivors make it to the "Denver Safezone", and Vanessa, her sister and the marine are out... I dunno, doing something or another, fighting some vampires.  There's a melodramatic moment between V and her sister, and a thought hit me that has been going through my mind quite a bit recently:  I am numb.  I am completely numb to all the drama and melodrama, and not just on TV, but in real life as well.  I really don't feel like arguing with anyone, nor even getting up on weekends and doing anything.  Am I depressed?  Am I psychotic?  Something else?  What's the deal?  It's like my zest for life has just disappeared.  I hope someone out there reading this is a shrink.  Feel free to jot me an e-mail and tell me what I've got. On the flip side, I was propositioned by a prostitute on Friday.  In my youth, I would have said, "n...

So after my blog post yesterday, I discovered some things.  Android Studio must be run with administrator rights.  That fixed the project creation issue. I am not Chip.  Just an fyi. So I found some sample code online and bam, Android Studio just mostly worked.  But after this little sample project, I feel deflated.  I went to work today and wrote a brief on Preservica, an archival storage system.  My day typically consists of nonsense like that.  We already have a great storage system that would cost nothing to use, but due to centralized IT and another agency charging us for the storage space, our system is "too expensive" to actually use. I go to these "CPMS meetings."  I spend at least 4 hours of my life every week in there pretending to pay attention, or sometimes not even pretending.  Sometimes I play with my phone.  I hate them with a passion. I get up and go to work every day.  Every morning I tell myself "I can'...

So I'm a 48-year old guy.  I am about 5 years from leaving my current job, which has been my career thus far for about 17.5 years now.  I will have to work another year or two after this one.  I feel very, very old.  I have arthritis in my knees.  But I still love programming, and I dream of traveling to foreign lands.  Will I make it happen?  I just don't know at this point.  Will I travel at all?  For sure.  My first stop after leaving my job will probably be to the old, familiar Myrtle Beach, where I will stare at the water for hours, visit Broadway at the Beach, and think about my aunt Judy and my now very distant family, mostly gone.